Loneliness and Grief #2 (10 ways to free the mind from grief)

This is a continuation post about suffering the passing of a loved one.   I’ve woven parts of my letter to my dad with information that I had for him.  As with my first post, I’ve cut out the very personal parts that are not necessary for understanding what I am speaking about.

Because  my dad  had a very curious mind and liked to look ata life from many different angles, I just took an excerpt from my book and sent it to him.  It was written with that in mind for him.

When most people grieve they are not looking for information about how the body works.  But knowing my dad I knew his value for learning, even in the middle of grief, was something he would be interested in.  So giving  information was one way to help him focus on things outside of his sadness.

It’s also OK to grieve, for as long as you need to.
It’s understandable to feel angry, lonely and sad.  That is part of the recovery process.

What I am asking is to stop  and change your thoughts when the memories turn to the traumatic events.  That part of life you already lived, no need to re-traumatize, that is not part of the healing for you.

If you are in deep grief my previous post might be of more help.  But, for those who are interested in more about how the mind works, read on.

Some facts about the mind:

1. Emotions are brought on by the thoughts and pictures that we think about.

2.  A thought or image has force and energy .

3. That energy created by images and thoughts  (positive or negative) moves throughout the mind and body.

4. Our thoughts have an impact on the mind and body.

5. They become similar to a magnet that attracts thoughts and memories with similar energy (vibrations).

6.  That is why painful thoughts attract similar memories of pain and sadness.

7.  We can change our thoughts.

8. Peaceful thoughts and images will attract other memories and feelings of peace and balance.

9.  No matter what is going on in life, people can learn to be in command of the thoughts they create.

10.  Even when there are stressors and events outside of your control, your thoughts can be developed in a way that has a positive impact, even changing  how you interpret  events.

Dad, I know that you have used this technique many times in the past, like the time you went to get the wig for your wife, after chemo, and you were so touched and happy about how caring the person who helped you was.  You came back from that appointment feeling uplifted, even though the situation was still a difficult one.

So you already understand that, no matter what events may have transpired  your mind can create thoughts that enhance your well-being.

Your own mind, and the thoughts you create, are the most powerful resource.  When you use it in this enhancing way.  So continue to guide your thoughts with positive energy.

I know how you have used your mind in a positive way through out my growing up years.  So, I’m not sending you the discussion on creating the deep change, by clearing out old limiting beliefs and repressed emotions.

You know how I work with my clients, doing deep change work.  Helping them to release  old sad memories and trauma. But that might not be necessary to get relief from your sadness.   You can make changes using your own thoughts. Use positive ones to re-program the way your mind works.  Start by experimenting with creating thoughts and pictures that work better that those of pain and loss.

More Information you might be interested in:

1. Rememeber your body is a complex living system,  every part affects every other part, including your emotions and you healing.

2. Your thoughts create physical reactions, such as the clenching in your stomach after a particularly traumatic memory.  Even a quick thought can generate a physical reaction in the body.

For example, just thinking about a fun vacation you had, remember the boat trip in the blue lagoon in Italy, I can see you smiling as you talk about it.   That memory created a reaction or vibration in your body, as if it were happening in the present.

3.  What you think has an impact on the “vibrations” that are sent throughout your body.

4. So, the way a you think can lead to positive vibrations, which lead to feelings of serenity and contentment.

So I leave you with this to think about, I know you have already created a path of positive memories, so this is just a gentle nudge in to use your mind in this time a recovery.  With all my love. Audrey